9.4.25
HORT HOGS: THEY ARE IN TERRIBLE PAIN BUT THIS IS WAR

dellon myette and i are making a game together and it is called HORT HOGS: THEY ARE IN TERRIBLE PAIN BUT THIS IS WAR. it's a 6mm kabbalah hot dog mech game. here's the story for all you NARRATIVE GAMERS:

it is the year 30XX. the world is once again lush and green after centuries of cataclysmic storms. but why?? it is the MEAT THAT FELL FROM HEAVEN. where it lands there is so much life, too much, really. and the people fear it. many have gathered in little villages and castles, clinging to the false comfort of kings and queens. but some have joined together, intent on carrying out the WORK OF CREATION. they have learned the secret names of GOD and fashioned the MEAT into beautiful and terrible creatures: the HORT HOGS. they seek to unite all humanity in this pursuit. but there are whispers of others, who seek symbiosis with the MEAT…

BE NOT AFRAID

	MEAT SYMBIOTES??

	MEGA PERSON

	THE TWELVE LEADING ORGANS

there are many reasons to make a game about celestial meat heralds, bound by the will of shadowy human agencies and wielded as weapons of war, but of course we wanted to capture two particular feelings:

1. the exhilaration of pinning your writhing opponent and visiting ULTIMATE VIOLENCE upon them, rending their captive flesh and devouring it to add to your strength while blood falls from the heavens and the keening of your foe is all around you, as seen in the "chainsaw penis" scene from the 1989 film ROBOT JOX by stuart gordon

IMMINENT CHAINSAW PENIS

2. the terror of losing control of the towering monstrosity you inhabit and gaining a momentary view into its alien designs through the nervous system you share, as you drift in a wave of SYNAPTIC FEEDBACK, helpless to intervene while heaven and earth are joined in a panoply of cascading forms, humanity and the erstwhile earth unrecognizable in the proliferation of new life brought forth from the heart of your nightmare steed, like the "berserk" scenes in the 1995 series NEON GENESIS EVANGELION by hideaki anno


AAAAA	AAAAAAAAA

and i am very confident that you will agree, we have done it! manifold visions of the world that is to come shall attend thee, and splendor and lamentation fall upon thy shoulders, in every game of HORT HOGS: THEY ARE IN TERRIBLE PAIN BUT THIS IS WAR, a game for 2 or more players.

A GAME FOR 2 OR MORE PLAYERS

let's have a few more informations. when you play HORT HOGS: THEY ARE IN TERRIBLE PAIN BUT THIS IS WAR, you will first decide: what is my relationship to MEAT? you have three choices:

- i love meat (controlling)
- i love meat (becoming)
- i fear meat

if you said, yes, i will make meat in my own image, congratulations! you are well-suited to advance the agenda of the HORT HOG AGENCIES. you will assemble a HORT HOG BRIGADE and protect the interests of your AGENCY as you pursue MEAT PERFECTION.

on the other hand if you said yes, i will give myself over to the meat, then you are a MEAT SYMBIOTE and you will walk a different path. but it will still be a meat path.

finally if you fear meat then you belong to the HUMAN DIASPORA. you lead a scribble-scrabble existence using cast-off technologies, like horsies and tanks and swords, somehow. you're hanging in there. blast off and strike the bydo empire / world of meat!!

so you see there is truly something for everyone, whether you love undulating piles of screaming flesh or horsies, there is a place for you in HORT HOGS: THEY ARE IN TERRIBLE PAIN BUT THIS IS WAR.


CLASSIC WARGAME EXPERIENCE	DROP DICE	HOLD RULER

you might think, but kyle, what is possible? how many ORGANS can my HORT HOG have? and how might they be arranged? these are natural questions to ask of any mech game and not to worry. HORT HOGS can be configured with all of the expected HORT HOG ORGANS, and more! here are just some of the possibilities:

- EYE
- MOUTH
- ARM
- LEG
- SKIN
- VESICLE
- SEED POD
- COTYLEDON
- INTESTINE
- ANTENNA
- OVIPOSITOR
- CRIBELLUM

VERTICAL AND HORIZONTAL CONFIGURATIONS

PUSH YOUR LUCK FOR HIGH SYNCHRO	CHANGE FACING TO PROTECT CRUCIAL ORGANS	THEY ARE IN TERRIBLE PAIN

what else what else?

- MEAT PILOT TERROR THRESHOLD puts you right in the HORT HOG!
- perform RESPONSES TO HOSTILE ACTIONS!
- experience COGNITIVE DISSOLUTION!
- interact with classic wargame terrain, like FOREST and HILL!
- follow the PATH OF THE FLAMING SWORD and suffer MEAT DAMAGE!
- devour the living flesh of your enemies, but watch out for MEAT MADNESS!
- become the VESSEL OF INFINITE FORMS and receive the gift of MUTATION!
- competitive, cooperative, and solo scenarios!
- pursue or thwart the agenda of the HORT HOG AGENCIES in a persistent CAMPAIGN!

AND MORE...


STEP ON LIL GUYS	SMASH TANKS AND HORSIES	MINIATURES COMING SOON

ALL MATTER IS MEAT
AND MEAT IS ALL THAT MATTERS
WE MUST MUTATE THE WHOLE WORLD INTO MEAT

HORT HOGS: THEY ARE IN TERRIBLE PAIN BUT THIS IS WAR BETA TEST COMING SOON!!

WE MUST MUTATE THE WHOLE WORLD INTO MEAT

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